Sunday, August 10, 2014

Not Crochet but need to write

Wednesday evening my mother who has a history of passing out from coughing (She has C.O.P.D.)went into a coughing fit passed out fell on tile floor bumped her head so hard it caused a lump the half the size of the back of her head so I called 911 they were here almost as fast as I called for that I am so appreciative.Because she was saying off the wall things like bad things are going through my head. When they asked her what they were she said I can't tell you. She did have a contusion on her brain a very small bleed they kept her for 2 days and released her with a suggestion of putting her in a nursing home my mom also has alcohol dependency problems no that's not why she passed out but it exasperates the problem. She also still smokes (you see the problem here?)I definitely  have my hands full even the doctors said so. She's stubborn opinionated and independent.She's 69 but sharp usually lately her memory hasn't been great for example she told me the fish I fried was spicy then asked for 2 jalapenos and a little ketchup(she HATES ketchup) as she was dipping the fish in some imaginary sauce and asked where is the sauce? I said what kind of sauce? she then asked sauce? did you say sauce? I said yes mom what kind of sauce do you want. she said what sauce? I got some tarter sauce and the questions stopped. I had made a promise to her years ago I would not put her in a nursing home ever Now the Dr. made this suggestion and brother in New Hampshire wants that too he wants no responsibility does not want to be involved. I am alone in this confused and scared but with the help of my 23 year old daughter at least for now we will figure it out.

Friday, August 1, 2014

Something that has become near and dear to me and I just joined about 2 weeks ago

  It was love at first sight for this lovely lady who started this giving from the heart as you will see from clicking the link

                                                  How it all got started                                                                                 
    Volunteer anyone if you would like to join or just follow and see the smile here is the link   Interested in volunteering?

Here are answers for frequently asked questions
 Do you know a child with Cancer or other illnesses that would love to know someone made them something with love? It's done at no cost just know that the child knows someone is thinking about them is payment enough
Children are noticed and loved by all no child should fight alone
that should say not fight alone
since that link is a PDF I have copied what it says should choose not to download it  

Feel Better Friends Doll Request

Please fill out this form completely and send the photos as requested below to
Feel Better Friends dolls are 100% donated to children who have cancer or other illnesses. As you can imagine, there is a high demand for these comforting dolls. My team of volunteers and I will do everything we can to get your FBF doll to his or her new home as soon as possible, but please allow several days, to weeks and sometimes months for us to create your handmade doll. If you feel that your situation is a rush, please let us know and we’ll do everything we can to get it to you sooner. For questions, comments or donation information please visit or email Shanon at Email for Feel better Friends

    Captionless Image

    Your Name *

    This is a required question

    Your Email *

    This is a required question

    Relationship to the child *

    This is a required question

    Child's Name *

    This is a required question

    Age *

    This is a required question
    If you've read everything and would like donate material or monetarily the group fund me link is here of course you can always email the founder of the group for info  feel better friends

Thursday, June 5, 2014

Love crocheting obviously I'm a bad blogger

I loved loved loved making this little guy?/Gal? so much fun I'm not an enthusiastic ami crocheter but I loved every step of this one even with the pattern translated it was informative and somewhat easy

The link for this cutie is here she has a friend a bumble bee I will make when I get the colorsthe owl is from a magazine.

Sunday, May 18, 2014

MY new project

The blanket softie and doll are all part of something new I have decided to do I am making blankets and soft animal with a similar book to go with them to donate to hospitalized children. I saw a doll similar to this and reminded me of a folklore doll. So  I made my own pattern.she will have a blanket and book also.

Friday, March 28, 2014

Cancer is an EVIL Vile Monster

Not about crochet but something I need to write about. On Tuesday I got an unexpected and surprising Facebook message (Note here my family is different my cousins are older than I am on my fathers side some closer to my moms age since there are only 20 years difference between mom and I)My cousin's daughter private messaged me on Tuesday that her father my cousin(62 years old) was in the ICU in critical condition and not expected to make it. That happened in one day we knew he had cirrhosis of the liver but at some point it turned to cancer on Tuesday his blood stopped clotting he had swelling of the brain and was put on a ventilator. He's now breathing on his own but the doctors are saying he has days if he's lucky weeks? On Wednesday my Aunt from my moms side of the family called and said her son has small cell carcinoma on his liver and lungs and has 3 to 6 months to live. Now my cousin on moms side has been battling mental illness all his life also (schizophrenia)He has made the choice to refuse treatments i.e. chemo and radiation he said he didn't think the added 2 or 3 years possible was worth it. Of course we all support him and it saddens all of us.(mom had a problem with his choice at first) But with the fight he has against the schizophrenia and then the weakness and sickness with the other treatments he just doesn't see the quality in life. He's 55 years old now.I was lucky and prayers are powerful I survived cervical cancer in 1993 it was found when I was 5 months pregnant. I am not superstitious but I am working on the same blanket that I had for others and found out they were critically ill it's kind of eerie after 18 years of not doing the stitch and having this all at once. I will continue the blanket as it is made prayerfully it's really turning into a prayer afghan instead of a prayer shawl.

Monday, March 24, 2014

A bittersweet crochet project.

I have been crocheting an afghan( progress pictures below) I am enjoying it but it's bitter sweet. I didn't learn the granny square first like most people do when they start out crocheting  I learned the shell stitch It wasn't good the first  thing I crocheted was a blanket for my grandmother I had the most amazing grandmother in the world no lie! She never had a negative word to say about anyone. She would tell me stories about her childhood filled with pet goats and all things good she told me her grandparents raised her I forgot what happened to her parents about 3 or 4 years ago I found out she was in an orphanage and the people that she called grandparents were actually either an Aunt and uncle or great aunt and uncle not clear and evidently not all things were as rosy as she said not that she lied she wanted me to grow up happy.She was my super hero.Anyways back to the blanket.I crocheted it when I was around 17 maybe she died when I was 23 I saw this same blanket a few months after she passed I helped my Aunt who she lived with get things together I had forgotten about it,but there it was folded at the end of her bed it was horrible stitches missed so totally uneven I looked at my aunt and said where did that come from? My Aunt smiled and said from you. I said why would she keep such a horrible looking thing? My Aunt said Grandma thought it was the beautiful thing ever made.Years later when I worked in a nursing home as an activity director I met a woman who reminded me of my grandmother I had fallen in love with this woman her family everyone when I transferred to another nursing home I started an afghan for her in shell while in the middle this adorable woman who never complained was sent to the hospital because she stopped going to activities which she loved I went at least every other day to visit her during her hospital stay she was  diagnosed with advanced lung cancer I was devastated. She was put on hospice upon her return to the nursing home on my days off I spent the day with her while her daughter set out on a secret see this woman had children who she  had not seen her in forty years we were able  worked to get them to see her before she died. I worked furiously and was able to finish the afghan a month before she passed. That was around 18 years ago.I made one for my mother in law who I loved dearly around the same time as the lady in the nursing home I'll call her Mrs.C. maybe. she (my mother-in-Law) passed away in 2001. So the last time I did this stitch was 18 years ago and now I have started one for myself the other 2 afghans went to the daughters of the women I made the afghans for.So you see It's bitter sweet.Why confusing? I don't know how to handle my mother having C.O.P.D. I have worked in nursing homes,and hospitals for over 20 years. Woke up to see my husband dead on the floor Nov.10. But this is devastating.She has a nurse that comes 2 times a week so far her vitals are good but her coughing is horrible and at  times she passes out. I need to get a job but can't leave her for long time intervals. That's the confusing bit.

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

Maybe changing or just having 2 blogs

Originally I started this because I am basically alone I'm afraid to leave the house for long periods of time because of my mom. She has C.O.P.D. and passes out from coughing. My husband died 5  years ago in a hotel we had been evacuated to because of hurricane Ike I woke up and found him on the floor. So I guess I was kind of traumatized and have never really come totally out of it I'm not as social as I used to be. That plus I live with my mom in an active senior living apartment complex is a combination that doesn't lead to alot of social gatherings that would be interesting for me. Not that I'm all that young but the age difference is 20+ years. I had this idea that THIS blog was going to be about crochet but I don't design alot and when I do I figure I am the only one that would like it so I don't share alot.  As for writing out a pattern I wouldn't know how to even start so that someone else would understand .  Because I decided this was about crochet it stays dormant for the most part unless I make something I am relatively proud of. What I set to do when I decided to blog was just to write out everything my thoughts daily goings on and such to keep my sanity but after reading others blogs (some of you are intimidating) You all are so interesting and bright and I got scared. And thought they will think I'm crazy or won't find me interesting. Add to all of this my punctuation is horrible and I have many run on sentences and sentence structure is not so good either.I account for this because of A.D.D. Lately I have many things going through my mind that I have to write them out sometimes it helps to work out the problems that are bothering me. What better forum other than a blog? Not that I want to blast all my personal life but my handwriting is so bad even I can't read it at times. My teachers weren't happy that was a time when writing was emphasized. I guess i am writing this to say why it's dormant alot not that I have a lot of followers I'm not even sure if anyone reads this. Not important this is for me and if it helps in any way for someone to read it I LOVE IT I have one blogger friend that is so encouraging and positive that I feel the need to thank her now and let her know how precious she is I know that she is that way to almost everyone I have seen her posts. Her name is Amanda from crafty in the med  HERE. Ok like a lot of times I am not sure how or where to end this so I am just going to say not sure what I will do but I have written some things on another blog that I have temporarily set up ,and who knows? I may just keep this one erase that one and just start writting here my brain is a jumble of things and even I a surprised sometimes.